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Birth parent questions

We have an 18 month old son through a closed adoption. The social worker for our birth family is still in touch with them and they have indicated that they are open to answering questions from us via the social worker. Knowing that their contact will likely dwindle as time goes on, I wanted to ask as many questions now that our son may wonder about in the future… while of course being respectful and sensitive to the birth family.

Are there any questions that your child/children wonder about (or that you think he or she will wonder about in the future) that you would suggest asking about now?


My son who is adopted is still too young. But my dad adopted me when I was little when he and my mom married. I’ve never wanted a relationship with my birth father and don’t remmeber hardly anything about him. But, from time to time, I have wondered what he was like when he was younger and when he and my mom were still together. What was his personality like? Was he out going, shy, or athletic? Did he play sports? Was he a good student? Etc. I know what he looks like and at one time was fascinated by the fact that I kind of looked like him. So, a picture might be good to have. My fascination was very….if scientific applied here, then that. Like looking at a bug under a microscope. 😄 I always felt connected to my dad who adopted me so it was never fascination stemming from wanting to connect with my birth father. It’s kind of an odd feeling to look like someone who is out there in the world but you have no realtionship with.
Also, medical history would be good to have. I don’t know much about my birth father’s family medical history so I just try to stay vigilant with my health and regular doctors visits. Our son’s mom gave us a basic family medical history and it was the usual stuff, various cancers, heart disease etc. We don’t know anything about his birth fathers side. But it might be good to ask if there is also some specific major health issue that run in the family.
Hope that helps! ❤️

Posted by cosmojones on Feb 08, 2019 at 6:43pm

Why he chose not to parent
interests and talents
eye color, hair colorreligion
family traits like musical or mechanical or good at computers
any siblings via him

Posted by Regina on Feb 09, 2019 at 12:03am

Have you asked in the adoptees forum? They are probably the best people to know what adoptees would want to know.

Posted by NoraT on Feb 22, 2019 at 3:13pm

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