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family history?
Posted: 26 January 2010 10:10 PM   Ignore ]  
Total Posts:  7
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Hi,

This may seem like an odd question, but my husband and I are considering adoption, and we’ve been talking about some of the conversations that would have new dimensions if we had a adopted child in our family.  One of the topics that came up was family history.  People on both sides of our families take family history seriously and they tell a lot of stories.  There are many conversations that begin, “so your great grandfather…”  or something similar.  This seems like one of those topics that could become tricky, especially when questions of identity arise.  How do others handle conversations like these?  Presumably it varies between kids, situations, and relationships between the adoptive family and the original family.

Thanks

Posted: 26 January 2010 11:02 PM   Ignore ]  
Total Posts:  28
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Are you speaking of the formal topic of genealogy? Or just casual stories of what has happened in previous generations?

I also come from a family of storytellers and the adopted members of our extended family (aged from 47 years old down to 3 months old) are included in these stories. When we talk about what great-grandma did after she came to this country from Norway, she is also our adopted children’s great-grandmother! But we also include the “when you joined our family” stories as well, because it is all part of our family history. And in cases of open adoption, we share those stories as well (as appropriate). My adopted children routinely hear from their “Florida Grandmother,” their birth mother’s mother. She is also now family.

However, no one in my family is interested in the official genealogy, so I cannot respond to that side of it.

Good luck!

Gretchen

Posted: 11 February 2010 05:15 AM   Ignore ]  
Total Posts:  9
Rank

I think I would just always make sure I made it clear that your families’ histories are also your child’s family history.  Just because there isn’t a biological connection doesn’t mean the child would not shar the family histories!

Posted: 16 February 2010 01:30 AM   Ignore ]  
Total Posts:  10
Rank

I agree with EthioMama and Global.  While their geneology is differnt your childs grandparents and their history’s will be the same.  Our son is our son and when we tell stories about “when Grandpa did…” he will always know that we are talking about the only grandpa he has ever known.  I think as you get further into the process it will all be easier grin

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