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Russia Waiting Parents

us newborn vs russia


Hi Everyone… I haven’t posted here before but I had a question that I thought some of you might be able to help me with.
We have been trying to do an international adoption for over 5 years (never completed mainly for financial reasons).  We are finally able to move forward and we had always thought we would like to adopt from Russia.  Last year however, we hosted a 9 year old boy from the Ukraine, which ended up being a disaster.  He had huge behavioural issues and the 3 weeks that he stayed here left me exhausted.  I started doing more research about RAD/FAE etc… after he left and really talked myself out of an eastern european adoption.  We are now updating our homestudy and have switched to a US newborn program. (although it hasn’t been completely approved- we could still change our minds about US domestic vs international)  We live in Canada so both countries are considered international for us.
I know that the wheels will move in a more consistent and forward motion if we choose to go to Russia (although I do know that there are always road bumps!!!)- and I"m afraid of having to wait over a year to 2 years to be matched with a newborn in the states. 
Any thoughts?
LB

Replies

There is really no right or wrong answer, just what you want. I would say not to get scared off because of your experience with a 9 year old. 9 year olds and infants are so different. I have done foster care and had some troubles with our 6 year old and 3 year old, but nothing like my experience with my infants. Either or both options for adoption sound great, US or Russia. Also, I am just learning about embryo adoption and it sounds like a great inexpensive alternative as well for some couples. Best of luck.

Posted by Private And Foster Mom on Jan 24, 2012 at 4:53am

When we started trying to sort this out about two years ago, I did a lot of soul-searching.  I couldn’t sort it out with any of the knowledge in my head or on the internet!  Ultimately, it was the wisdom of my wife’s religion that made the decision for us. Her faith has a principle that you should look first to your family, then to your community, then your country, then the world when weighing your decisions.  Essentially it says that if you are trying to make the world a better place, start local.  That was what sealed it for us, in terms of choosing domestic adoption.  I wish you best of luck in making whatever decision is right for you!

Posted by Thalas'shaya on Jan 24, 2012 at 2:45pm

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