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affording adoption through grants

Hey Folks,

My wife and I have been wanting to adopt for a while now.  The problem is the cost.  Between the two of use, we make about 65,000 a year, and I am just about to finish paying off school loans.  Our assets are quite small, and while we are very frugal people, but the cost around here seems to be between 35,000 and 45,000 per adoption-more than we can afford for a while.  I understand that tax deductions can help with some of this, but only so much.
We have looked into grants, but we have no idea of the odds of getting enough grant money.  Also, there is the uncertainty- most grants require you to be in the process of adopting; you must go in for the whole thing, not wait to see if you get a grant.  Does anyone have any advice on how to approach this?  We are worried that we may get partway in, find that we did not get any grants, and then we are in over our heads financially.

I would love to hear from any folks who are working on navigating this.  We are not sure what to do.  We are ready to be parents in all ways except the cost of adopting.  Thoughts or even just knowledge that other folks are trying to figure this out too would be greatly appreciated.

A few things about us:
-we are hoping to adopt an infant.
-we are hoping to adopt a baby of any race- just a baby who needs a home.


Does the fact that you want an infant, and in order to get that infant it will cost you $36,000-$45,000 make anything sink in?
notice your said nothing about caring about the mother, the parents, bio family, just your money, and what you want.

Posted by NoraT on Nov 14, 2020 at 2:39am

Hello Sanderlings,

You are right that grants are not a sure thing and have the expectation that you will be mid way thru the process. I do know someone who got part way thru a private adoption and then did not have the money to finish.

.Your options are -

1.  look into the foster care adoptions which would have other insecurities but cost wise would be much less stressful. There are two ways - either outright adoption (less frequent) or foster to adopt, which case the child might possibly be reunited with birth parents. It also might take some time to be chosen to foster a child. Contact your local dept of Children and Family Services for info and to take the required classes which should help thru the process.

2. Continue as you are and scrimp and save, ask family for help, apply for grants, cut your expenses, sell what you can, do fundraisers, take second jobs, see if either of you is employed by anyone that would help sponsor, etc. until you can feel that you are likely to complete the adoption- and then begin the process.If there is any local pre adoption support group you can join you might get some ideas and inspiration for the process.

Remember with all options with raising a child there is no guarantee ie the child may need medical care, may have a disability, you may have financial or other emergencies. What i am saying here is you need to feel able and demonstrate the ability to support and raise a child but then there often is an element of dedication, sacrifice, problem solving, and community support that is necessary from then on for most people raising families in this day and age.

Good luck to you!

Posted by Happy Camper on Dec 17, 2020 at 4:44am

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