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Would you considering adopt a 16-year-old?


Would you considering adopt an older child? like.. 16 years old
Im looking forward to your reply, Thank you for your time

Replies

This year I had an adoption fall through on a 17 years old who has been my foster child since she was 15.  She stopped the adoption herself.  I have done some research and have found out that teen adoptions rarely finanize….the child pulls out or sabatoges it. 

In this case, my foster daughter has an inability to attach to people (other than her bio sister), friends last about 3-4 weeks.  If your child has any attachment issues…they are not going to go away…address it with professionals.

I specifically wanted to adopt an older child.  It bothers me terribly that children age out of the system and then have no family, no place at the table for Christmas dinner, etc. 

Of course, it is not unheard of for a teen adoption to finalize but I unfortunately was part of the statistics.
That being said, I have not removed from my file that I would consider a teen.

My advise is to get as much infomation as possible and then dig, dig, dig somemore.

Posted by Annette68 on Jun 08, 2013 at 4:55am

Thank you for replying. Im actually that ‘16 years old’ teen and i want to find a family, I’ve been looking for a family that is willing to adopt a 16-year-old on the internet for a year, but i didnt find one.. and I wont give up on that. Please reply me if you do want to adopt a 16-year-old.. (i know this is happening too fast.. but please consider me!)

Posted by a1ison on Jun 08, 2013 at 5:44am

i am in the process of adopting a 13-year-old girl. know that there are parents out there who would welcome older kids. i had been warned that teenagers come fully formed, but what i have seen from my future daughter is that there is plenty of room for growth and change.

personally, i think that the reason that many/most adoptions of older kids don’t finalize is that being adopted means that the adoptee gives up some of the ability s/he had to chart his/her own future. that’s a major change from foster care. that is, with family comes responsibilities and compromise. you’re not in charge of your life in the same way that you were in foster care. however, if you understand this, adoption is possible. just keep putting yourself out there and know that the hesitation isn’t about you personally, but about everything that prospective adoptive parents hear about foster kids. good luck—and write with updates!

Posted by lachicuela on Jun 09, 2013 at 6:04pm

We are in the process of adopting a 15 and 16 year old brother and sister.  They are sitting here with us as I type this.  We have our Order Placing Child already signed and are just beginning our 6 month wait for the adoption to be final.  They moved in with us on June 1 so we just completed our first week as a family.  Things are going pretty good so far as we adjust to each other!!  They are great kids and I don’t expect any major issues, but we are prepared for whatever comes.  Already had our first meeting with a therapist and hoping we bond enough that they will consider this home when they are adults!!  If not we will do the best we can with the time we have with them!!  We are lucky to have found them and are hoping for the best!!

Posted by 4catzlover on Jun 09, 2013 at 7:16pm

@lachicuela Thank you so much for sharing and I’ll not give up till i find a family that is welcoming me.

Posted by a1ison on Jun 10, 2013 at 3:18am

@4catzlover Thank you so much for sharing <3

Posted by a1ison on Jun 10, 2013 at 3:19am

Good luck to you—I hope you find your family. We are in the process of adopting a 14-year-old boy from foster care in the United States. It has been a very difficult process because everything is harder when one is a teen (and for the reasons mentioned above). Legally, we haven’t had trouble—it’s all emotional.

I hope you have success.

Posted by K. Kirk on Jun 19, 2013 at 10:30pm

@K. Kirk Thank you so much

Posted by a1ison on Jun 20, 2013 at 3:03am

Oh I really hope you find your family!

I’ve read some of your posts on other sites and my heart is aching for you. I wish I was in a position to help.

I don’t know how the system works in China, but fight for yourself as much as you can. Are there any adoption agencies you can get in touch with? Even if they do not place older children they may know someone who can help you.

Posted by toinfinityandbiond on Nov 22, 2013 at 8:51pm

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