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Kansas Adoptive Families

Non married couple adopting...


My partner are not a LGBT couple but in many ways we are similar. We are not legally wed.

I am disabled and I get my medical from the state, which provide me with Personal Care Attendants. If we were to marry I would lose my medical and the vital care I need to live. We have a homestudy and live like a married couple. We even had a commitment ceremony. This has been a huge obstical in our adoption plans. However, now we have been matched. Contracts and all the “official” stuff are pending, but we caught a snag today. When I spoke to the lawyer handling this situation he isn’t sure how we will be able to finalize. We live in KS and he said they don’t do two parent adoptions. Nor do they do one parent adopting while the other takes guardianship (although we have friends who have done that).
I hope this doesn’t interupt our match! Have any of you been in a similar situation? How did you adopt your children? Help!!


This has not happened to us, but we have an amazing attorney in Wichita.  He is someone that other lawyers go to when a hitch or snag happens in an adoption.  His name is Martin Bauer.  I can get you his contact info if you would like it.
Good luck!

Posted by CarrieP on Nov 22, 2011 at 5:32am


I’d ask your friends for the name of their lawyer, and do a phone consultation.  Tell him or her what your situation is (leaving out the problems with the other lawyer) and see what your options are. Then if your original lawyer is not able to address your needs, switch to one who can.  Good luck!

Posted by Happy Camper on Nov 22, 2011 at 11:37am

Carrie- How ironic is this?!?!?!?! Yesterday after I fired out this post I spoke to the women from the agency. I guess this lawyer called her and made it sound like we were trying to run some sort of scam by not getting married. Whew!!!!!!!!!!! I was p’d! So I went to call the lawyer our friends used. For some reason I dialed the wrong number. Then I remembered that when we were first starting out I had spoken to a lawyer in Wichita who knows the judge who does two parent adoptions. I called him, he remembered us and our situation, he called the judge and she said she’d do it and now we have the BEST lawyer on our side…. Can you guess who he is CarrieP??? :D

Posted by SunnieMom81 on Nov 22, 2011 at 10:13pm

Yay!!!!  He knows his adoption stuff smile  When is the baby due?

Posted by CarrieP on Nov 23, 2011 at 3:28am

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