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Hi Everyone!

I’ve been looking for an online group for adoptive parents that is actually active. Looks like there’s quite a few posts here, so I’m looking forward to joining the group.

I’m a single woman who lives with her BF. I’m planning to adopt an infant as a single parent.

Currently I’m working on my adoption profile. It’s been interesting as I’m adopting as a single even though my child will end up being raised by me and my bf. Striking that balance has been a bit challenging.

BTW, Am I the only one who created a checklist of things to do for pre-match and after match?

Replies

Hi Annie,

I’m also adopting as a single person, but I’m not in a relationship. I completed my profile book and pretty happy with it. Just waiting right now. I also have an excel sheets for everything; documents for applying, list of expenses for grant applications; baby items I’d like to purchase, etc. Good luck!

Posted by Life12G00d on Aug 14, 2017 at 6:56pm

Welcome! Let me be the first to warn you however to be very careful here. There are many scammers here. Anyone here who asks for personal information or demands you send their lawyers money to start the process of adoption please do not do it.

That being said there are those of us desperately waiting. It is so hard to wait. Make your list also make your list of those things you might be tempted to put on hold because you think you might be adopting at any moment.

Do the things on that list too! A reminder to invest in yourself and those you love and have in your life already

Posted by Waiting inWa1998 on Aug 14, 2017 at 7:53pm

Well, are you in your profile going to be honest that you live with your boyfriend and you intend that the child will be raised by you and him? Although you are not married and don’t have that commitment? That your BF will be raising the child but have no legal commitment?
That’s something that expectant parents who are considering surrendering—and surrendering to you—would want to know.

Posted by Maryam on Aug 22, 2017 at 5:17am

Sounds like the child will be raised in a two-parent household so I would suggest doing the profile book as if you were both adopting since you’ll both be parenting the child. Certainly disclose your current living arrangements and I’d guess most emoms will want to know why you two are choosing not to marry. Many emoms will prob be fine with you two not marrying but they deserve to know there is someone else in the picture who will be raising their child.
Profile books are stressful for most families, so you’re not alone. smile

Just try your best to be yourself.

And yes on the lists. I’m sure they’ll be so handy when the time comes.

Posted by momma21 on Aug 22, 2017 at 11:53pm

Where is everyone putting profiles?  Also, is it common to pay a application fee?  There is one in my area charging a $500 application fee… it seems like a lot.

Posted by Emiluke on Oct 01, 2017 at 8:46pm

Do you plan on doing anything legal to protect the child if something would happen to you? Like if you died and he didn’t have adoption rights unless you named him as guardian things could get into a sticky place. Child could be removed from him and the child could be very attached (at least we hope the child would be) to him.

Or if you separated and the child is attached to him would there be a written plan for child visitation? Support? What if he wants visitation and you don’t want to allow it? Or you want visitation and he doesn’t want it?

What if any financial support is he on board for? College? Food? Nothing? Be sure your legal ducks are in a row.

Stuff happens. Be sure you talk to a lawyer re issues to protect the child.That is an important job for a parent.

Posted by Regina on Oct 02, 2017 at 3:24am

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