I would immediately contact your lawyer/social worker and tell them what you are thinking…and ask for advice.  But personally (and this is just me) I would call them (the birth parents) and let them know that you are open to adopting more children and if there is a possibility that any of the siblings were available you would like to be 1st on the list to be considered.  You have nothing to lose and everything to gain, especially if you have an open/good/honest relationship with them.  You never know, they may be relieved to hear from you because they don’t know how to handle the situation and they are under a lot of stress and pressure..  But like I said, that is just me…you have to do whatever your heart tells you.  Follow your little voice in the back of your head (your intuition) and stay positive!  *smile Sending you BLESSING of GOOD VIBES AND LOVE…I would love to hear the follow up to your situation…and you can always private message me!
Much love!
Meg

Meg thank you ... yes, I contacted our social worker and lawyer… we do have a great open relationship and we are drafting a letter for them to review because we feel just like you nothing to lose everything to gain.  We have been offering to raise all, some and at any possible time during this process they want to/need to we are ready/willing/able and desiring to have them grace our home.  I will let you know how it plays out… thank you…

I agree with Meg.  I think you need legal advice and advice from an adoption professional/social worker certainly couldn’t hurt.  If you have a positive relationship with your child’s birthfamily, I believe they will be relieved and understand that you have your child’s best interests at heart as well as the best interests of the siblings and the birth family. 

We adopted our daughter as an infant and much to our surprise 4 years later, we received a phone call that her birthmother was pregnant and due to tragic circumstances, unable to care for the child she was expecting.  We were given the amazing opportunity to adopt the new baby and I just can not imagine how I would have felt if I had found out years later, if we had not had that opportunity, that this sibling was out there in the world with another family.  We are so lucky to have them together.  I know our birthmother was very relieved when we said yes because she had the same thought.  Because it was unexpected that she was pregnant and not able to care for this youngest child, she did not know if we would want another child but she, too, could not imagine him not being with his sister. 

So, I really think that if you approach it in a loving and caring way, they will see the good intentions that you have.

Best of luck, and please do keep us posted.  You may also message me privately.  God Bless!!!

~linda

oops, forgot to include my e-mail address:
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~linda

You’ve got great advice above so I just wanted to wish you good luck. Its nice that your SW/lawyer can review your letter and help you formulate how you want to say this. Hopefully you will get a positive response.

I totally agree that you should work through this with a lawyer and/or social worker.  I think it would be wonderful for your daughter if her siblings could be raised with her.  However, I would caution you about seeming too pushy with the birth parents, even if you have a good, open adoption with them.  This will probably be a huge and difficult decision for them.  Their emotions need to be respected.  Perhaps they will be relieved at your offer to adopt your daughter’s siblings.  But they also may not be ready to place their children with you or may want to try other avenues that will allow them to parent their children.  If you come on too strong, it may make them feel cornered and they may reject you.

My advice would be to have a social worker let them know that you are willing to accept your daughter’s siblings into your family so that it is an option for them to consider.  They may not know that you would be willing to accept more children.  I am a former foster parent to two infants who were placed with us separately with the hopes that we would eventually be able to adopt them.  Both ended up going back to their birth families.  However, we were eventually able to establish a strong relationship with each of our foster children’s families by respecting their strong desire to parent their own children, and providing moral and emotional support and friendship.  These kids still mean so much to us and it’s great that we’ve been able to establish a close relationship with their families.  I tell you this because if you come on too strongly to your daughter’s birth family, it could end up alienating them.  You want to be respectful and supportive of their wishes, whatever that may be, while letting them know that you are willing to be a resource for them if they decide that they can’t continue parenting their children.  This will probably be a heartbreaking decision for them.

I do believe that it would be a very positive experience for your daughter to be raised with her siblings as part of your family.  A few months after we adopted our oldest son we heard that his birth moth was pregnant again and were asked if we would be willing to adopt his younger sibling as well.  We accepted believing that it was very important for our son to be raised with his biological sibling.  They are only ten months apart in age and they are very close.  It was a good decision.  I applaud your willingness to accept your daughter’s siblings into your family and I understand your excitement at the prospect.  But please don’t forget that this will be a difficult decision for the birth parents.  It’s best to be open and supportive of their decision, whatever that may be, with the hopes that together you can work out something that will be in the best interest for all your children.

Is there any organisation that can help the parents out re their situation?  I have to admit I haven’t heard of multiples being separated in these modern days.  Are they triplets or more?  Perhaps they should contact a Multiple Births association - here are some links.

http://www.marvelousmultiples.com/sites.html