Find Adoption Services



Find Agencies by Country

Join Adoption Groups!

Click the arrows to expand each group category below

Family Building Options

Starting Out in Adoption

Waiting to Adopt

U.S. Newborn Adoption

U.S. Foster Adoption

International Adoption

My Family

My Adoption Interests

My Child's Age/Stage

My Location

The Adoption Triad

Matched But Waiting

It's a boy!!!


So yesterday we got a call from our adoption coordinator to let us know what the ultrasound revealed.  And it appears we are “expecting” a boy!  My husband is exstatic! He would be happy and in love with a baby girl, but feeling outnumbered in our mostly female household, he is very happy that if all goes well, we’ll have a baby boy in Oct!

Replies

Congrats!

Posted by Private And Foster Mom on May 11, 2012 at 3:01am

How exciting!  Congratulations

Posted by RRB on May 11, 2012 at 3:49am

Congratulations!!!  We are also expecting a little boy in July.  My husband is also over the moon and has so may plans about what he is going to teach him.  It’s so cute to hear him talk about it.  Wish you the best and for the next few months to go by quick.

If you don’t mind me asking are you guys getting the opportunity to meet with the mom?  We were just matched a few days ago and we will be having our first call with her in the next few days.  We hope to meet with her before the birth if she’s up for it.

Wishing you the best!

Posted by Cbornstein on May 16, 2012 at 2:34am

Congratulations!!!  We are also expecting a little boy in July.  My husband is also over the moon and has so may plans about what he is going to teach him.  It’s so cute to hear him talk about it.  Wish you the best and for the next few months to go by quick.

If you don’t mind me asking are you guys getting the opportunity to meet with the mom?  We were just matched a few days ago and we will be having our first call with her in the next few days.  We hope to meet with her before the birth if she’s up for it.

Wishing you the best!

Posted by Cbornstein on May 16, 2012 at 2:34am

Congrats!!! I hope all goes well

Posted by rainablu on May 16, 2012 at 3:47am

Cbornstein - We will not likely get to meet the mother we are matched to.  She she wants a closed/semi-open adoption.  We have exchanged phone numbers and first names, but no other contact info.  She is open to phone calls (we’ve had one so far) and text messages, but for now she doesn’t want to meet nor allow us to be involved with Dr’s appointments. After birth she wants occasions pictures and updates but nothing else, and this may likely go thru the agency.  Since the due date is not until Oct, we really have not discussed what the hospital plan will be.

Wishing you the best.  I was SO nervous for our first phone call.

Posted by thefabfundys on May 18, 2012 at 6:57pm

We are getting to know our EM by writing emails and I think sometime in the future we will do a call.  We respect her wishes and what she is comfortable with.  From what we’ve learned about each other it just feels so right.  She thinks so too.  We are so blessed to have her. 

Continuing to wish you the best!

Posted by Cbornstein on May 20, 2012 at 3:18pm

Update:
Last Tuesday we received a call from our agency.  The mother we have been matched with since April has indicated to our agency that she has changed her mind about the adoption.  She did so via txt message.  They have been able to get txt responses from her, but she will not answer their phone calls.  The agency stopped all financial support and if planned to send a social worker to her apartment if she does did not make contact before Friday.  This morning, before the social worker made a house call, she called her coordinator.  From that conversation, the agency has decided to stop working with her on adoption plan.

Her coordinator will continue to to make weekly contact with her for now.  The agency wants to be sure she’s thought this through and want to be sure she’s sure about stopping her adoption plan.  She’s been very consistent and then made a snap decision… I won’t go into the personal reasons she’s indicated at this point, but the agency hasn’t completely written her off yet. 

It’s a very sad situation for this expectant mother. Most of her resources (rent and extra living expenses pain by us via agency) will be running out by next week…if not sooner.  Rent will be due a couple of weeks, and if she can’t pay, then she’ll likely be evicted…and homeless once again.  She has her five children living with her right now.  Five innocent children are soon to be hungry and without a home and many basic necessities.  Plus there is another child, the child we hoped to have join our family, on the way…due just 4 weeks from today.  Unless she finds a job or a way to pay the rent and for food etc, the agency is required to report her and the children’s living situation to CPS.  (Yes I know that being homeless and one call to CPS does not mean she will lose the two youngest, but as some people know sometimes one call to CPS is all it takes…I’m not here to discuss or argue this point)

While I’m glad the kids situation will be monitored and hopefully taken care of, I hate that this feels like a “scare tactic”...asking a mother to choose between keeping one child or five children.  She will likely lose the three oldest kids to their father once she is homeless.  The other two…well, if she cannot provide shelter and food, then she could lose them to CPS.  It’s just heartbreaking. (Yes I know see above note…I’m not here to discuss or argue this point)

We knew there were no guarantees, but that doesn’t really make us feel better.  We are having a lot of mixed emotions and will have to work through these in our own way.

Please keep this mother and especially her many children in your prayers.  These children are innocent and in an unfortunate situation.  We are ok.  We will continue to live our charmed life.  A charmed, wonderful life, just waiting for the right child to join our family. 

For now we are in a pause. Letting what has happened sink in and dealing with feels very much like a great loss.

Posted by thefabfundys on Sep 18, 2012 at 8:52pm

Reply to this thread

You must be logged in to reply. To login, click here. Not a member? Join AdoptiveFamiliesCircle today. It's free and easy!


Recommended Adoption Book

Order today!
Order today!