Independent but considering signing with 2 low upfront cost agencies after a year of advertising. I’m single but very open. 2 failed situations.

We adopted independently. You control your costs, what & where you advertise etc. Also, our homestudy took no time to complete, with no hoops to jump through, unlike many friends we have whose took much longer, and cost more through an agency.

i’m adopting through a facilitator, they are a cross between an agency and working independently. they do the same hand holding as an agency, they provide support and guide you towards the right resources and information for your specific state.

you are given a list of task that you have to complete in order to be matched so you don’t have to navigate through the maze of the adoption process alone. working with a facilitator provides a bit more freedom to work at your own pace and the cost is much lower then working with an agency. their success rate is higher then most agencies because the post your information through numerous avenues, for example through many websites their own and non affiliated agencies, hospitals, lawyers, adoption magazines etc.

i would recommend it to anyone who wants the best of both an agency and doing it on their own the only negative is that facilitators are only able to work with specific states not all for legal reasons. for example facilitators are not legally able to work in states like New York.

Ours was a hybrid approach. We signed on with an agency, they did our home study, and we paid them for that and a small application fee. They were great at the hand holding and instructional part, but they don’t have alot of money to market their agency nor their PAPs (because they don’t ask for upfront fees.) So, after waiting about 3-4 months, I decided to also do my own work on networking to find a situation (website/blog, online ads, fliers, pass along cards, joining forums and telling our story). In the end, we found our daughter’s birth mom on a forum. Since she lived in another state, we found an attorney to represent her in her state and we chose to work with our agency to represent us in our state. Our agency worked with us on the fee since the attorney for the birth mom was doing alot of work, so that worked out in terms of fees.  Best of luck!

We worked with facilitators both times. I wouldn’t recommend it. There are a few very good, reputable, helpful facilitators. However, it’s been my experience that they are the exception.

I’m an adoption attorney, and at my seminars I always tell people that the agency/independent decision is largely a sliding scale of money vs. time.  If you have a lot of time to put into looking for a placement and not a lot of money, independent is the way to go.  However, if you can afford it and would like someone else to handle finding the match, then an agency is for you.  No matter which way you go, be sure to ask a lot of questions about what services the agency or attorney provides, how quickly you can expect to have your calls returned, etc.  There’s no right answer - only what’s right for you.

I agree with rredhead to beware of facilitators - there’s a reason why they’re illegal in most states.

We adopted through an agency and loved it!  The amount of education and support that was given to us throughout our process was so incredibly valuable, and they provide even more to the birth families.  We never felt alone, felt like we had so many people working hard on our behalf.  Any question we had, any concern we had… they were there.  We felt confident that the birth family that chose us would be completely supported and given whatever they needed to help them make the best decision for the baby, their families, and themselves.  It was worth every penny, and our wait really was minimal in the grand scheme of things.  I’d recommend it.

We had a fantastic experience with an agency. They were recommended by another adoptive parent, had been in business for over 25 years, and everything about their office and staff just felt right. Our daughter was placed with us five months after we finished our home study, and the whole process was as straightforward as it could have been. We felt more comfortable going with an agency because all of the information we were reviewing was just so overwhelming - it was nice to have someone who could be really clear about the process and make sure we’d done everything that we needed to.

We adopted through an agency and had a great experience.  It was a little expensive, but we knew the total cost up front so there were no surprises.  It was nice to let them handle a lot of the marketing for us, and their attorneys handled the finalization.  I think we could have finalized a little faster had we gone through an attorney, but it wasn’t too bad.  The best part was building connections with other local adoptive parents through the Infant Adoption Class.  I still keep in touch with a lot of the moms.  From our first meeting with the agency to the day we took our son home was a year, and then 8 months later we finalized.  Best of luck in your adoption journey!

We are searching independently via FB networking, twitter, and using a parent profile website (http://www.americaadopts.com). We connected with our daughters first birth mother through word of mouth. We hired separate attorneys for us and the birth mother. We paid directly for her counseling. We’re going the same route again, and we’re about 14 months into our search. It’s a LOT of work on our part…spending at least an hour on line every day networking. However, our first adoption costs were under 10K so it’s worth it to us, as a middle income family. It also worked out great because we really established a relationship with the BM, on our and her own terms. We have a great relationship with her today.

We are searching independently via FB networking, twitter, and using a parent profile website (http://www.americaadopts.com). We connected with our daughters first birth mother through word of mouth. We hired separate attorneys for us and the birth mother. We paid directly for her counseling. We’re going the same route again, and we’re about 14 months into our search. It’s a LOT of work on our part…spending at least an hour on line every day networking. However, our first adoption costs were under 10K so it’s worth it to us, as a middle income family. It also worked out great because we really established a relationship with the BM, on our and her own terms. We have a great relationship with her today.

We adopted our son last year independently and are now pursuing #2 through independent. 
Angela
http://scottandangelaadopt.com

We went through an agency

We’ve used agencies for all our adoptions - 2 international, 2 domestic.

We are actually working with an agency and privately with an attorney.  Since we are in New York, we cannot work with a facilitator (as noted above), but we know that some e-moms may be more comfortable with an agency and others with a private adoption and we want to be open to either option when the right match comes along… hopefully soon!