Find Adoption Services
Find Agencies by Country
Adoption News and Media Group
Adoption & Destiny
In a recent New York Times blog, titled
“Adoption, Destiny and Magical Thinking,”, the topic of adoptive parents believing that their child was “destined” to be theirs is discussed.
The author talked to adoption professionals who think that adoptive parents might “feel more motivated than birth parents to believe in fate. Narratives of destiny provide a sense of legitimacy.” By saying that the child is legitimately theirs, then it they feel entitled to be his/her parents.
The difficulties with this way of thinking is that may seem to minimize the hard decisions of the birth parents or the loss that the adoptee may feel.
Not all of the adoptive parents the author talked to felt that their adoption was “destined”. Instead, they believed that their child came to their family through an amazing alignment of coincidences.
The blog’s author also uncovered that many adoptive parents can look past, and sometimes are grateful for, the hardships, such as infertility, which led them to their choice to adopt. The parents believe that they had to go through those painful times in order to receive the child they did.
After reading the blog, what are your thoughts?
Do you tell others that you were “destined” to be your child’s parents?
Was it destiny? A divine intervention? Coincidences? Alignment of the stars?
If you chose adoption after infertility, do you now believe your infertility past was a necessary step toward parenthood?
Most Popular Articles on AdoptiveFamilies.com
Recommended Adoption Book