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How much openness do you have?
Posted: 30 September 2009 08:58 PM   Ignore ]  
Total Posts:  7

If you’re in an open adoption, give a brief description about what openness means in your family.

As for us, we consider Tessa’s firstparents as extended family. We’ve been connected to Crystal since 10 days before Tessa was born (in 2001), and with Joe for about a year.  So far, there have been a few bumps in the road, but overall, it’s a very healthy situation for all.

We have an “open door” situation with Reed’s firstparents. We’d love to see more of his firstmother, who has moved out of state and has two young children. We have never had contact with his firstfather. At 6 years old, Reed is beginning to ask the Why questions.

Lori Holden
Blog: (
Book: The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption: Helping Your Child Grow Up Whole (

Posted: 05 October 2009 04:16 PM   Ignore ]  
Total Posts:  8

We have periodic email communication with Cora’s birthmom.  We have visited in the past, but she lives sevearl states away now, so that isn’t as easy to do.  We also have a website with photos that we update regularly.  Cora’s birthmom can call or email anytime.  We were thrilled that she called us when she gave birth to her son.  Cora got to talk to her and was very happy as well.  Was also very happy to meet her baby brother when they came to visit.

We have more frequent contact with Avery’s birthmom.  We text at least once a week, email here and there, and have visited 3 times since Avery’s birth.  We visit with her and Avery’s birthsister as often as we all can, but its a 4 hour trip, so not too often.

We don’t have contact with either birthfather at this point.  Wish we did, but in once case he did not want to and in the other he is not in a place mentally where that would be healthy for our family.