I appreciate your article Danielle. I’m not happy to admit that I did not recognize (or was in denial about) attachment issues in my daughter,…...
Adoption Blog: Painting the Nursery
Unemployed? No, I’m in Transition: My New Chapter of Life as a Stay-at-Home Mom
A year ago at this time I was a recruiter seeking work. I had been laid off from two companies, one where I had been employed for five years, awaiting the opportunity to take a family leave when my adoption came through; the other hired me immediately after and had to lay me off when they lost a large client due to the economy. Things looked bleak.
I considered myself "in transition," as a large number of those of us who have become victims of the economy and layoffs choose to call being between jobs. It makes it seem easier to say, "in transition" or "between Jobs," as opposed to "laid off" or "unemployed," which have such negative connotations. But jobs were few and far between at that time, and due to my former employer being a staffing agency, I had a non-compete clause in my contract to contend with, which kept me from pursuing any employment opportunities that could have been perceived as competitors—even though it wasn’t my choice to leave—so other agencies were off limits.
Flash forward to spring of 2010. Everything has changed for us. I am still seeking work, but now I have a new title while doing so: "Stay-at-home Mom" to my newly adopted son Miles.
This is a title I’ve wanted for years and feel especially blessed to be here now. Plus, I’ve had my husband with me—he’s been able to take a nice, lengthy paternity leave—for the past couple of months as we adjust to being new parents.
Because of the differences in our salaries, I thought I needed to be back at work before him, but he’s maintained his employment) and I’m still in "search mode."
There are more positions out there now than there were this time last year, and my husband has just returned to work, taking on a second part-time job. He works unique hours, with breaks during a few of the days during the week—perfect timing for him to come home, have a meal, and get the chance to feed our son and give me a shower or other break after being primary caregiver to the baby.
Miles and I are getting into a routine. My husband and I do split shifts on the overnights and Miles was kind enough to begin sleeping through the night (at least five hours between bottles) when he turned eight-weeks-old. (We know exactly how much of an angel our son is.)
If Miles gets fussy while my husband is at work, we go out for a walk with him in the stroller. This has great advantages for both of us. He calms down once he’s secure in his car seat/stroller and I’ve been able to start taking off some of this "baby weight" I put on since he’s entered our lives. I know what you’re thinking, I didn’t gain pregnancy weight; but having adopted in the winter, we’ve been indoors for the first couple of months of his life.
Maybe my next blog will be whether I have found a new job—or more about how I’m handling stay-at-home motherhood. With my husband around the past couple of months, shopping and laundry were done in our "team parenting approach" so those tasks will get a bit more challenging as I try to do them alone for the first time. Did I mention we live in an apartment building where we need to figure out the laundry duties? Meanwhile, it’s been a terrific chapter of my life, and I’m having a blast!
Tags: laid off, stay at home mom, unemployed
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