Barbara, Like Sadie, I feel like an ambassador for open adoption. My husband Jeff was adopted in 1963 and we adopted a domestic newborn in…...
Share all your shots that capture the seasonal spirit!
School Days Photo Contest
Meet the winner, Maya (8, India), and the finalists.
AF Cover Photo Contest
Meet the winner, Bruno (4, U.S.) and the finalists.
Summer Fun Photos Contest
Meet the winners, Halle, Payton, Sofia, and Parker, and the finalists.
Adoption Blog: Improv Mom
That’s My Girl
My daughter, with her mass of Marilyn Monroe curls, fair skin, and big hazel eyes framed with super long lashes that Claire Danes could only dream about growing, looks nothing like my husband, Tony, or me. However, now that Beth, adopted domestically, is three, I can clearly see a family resemblance.
First of all, she sounds and gestures just like us. I'm fond of saying to her in a fake stern voice, "Beth!" to grab her attention, and then, "I- Love-You-So-Much." She's started to do it to me, catching me by surprise every so often, making me want to cry every time. Then there's the standard "Sure" (pronounced "shore") in answer to a number of basic questions, from, "Do you want to call Grandpa?" to "Did you pee on the couch?" (Each "Shore" is also a gentle reminder for me to work on re-losing my regional New York accent.) Of course, Beth says plenty of things using a non-regional accent that make me want to cringe, like, "Uhhhhh…my back hurts," as she hunches over, clutching her lower back, just like her dear, middle-aged dad.
Since Tony and I have performance backgrounds, most notably writing and performing sketch comedy in the mid-90s, we're very happy to see that our daughter was born with the "jokester" gene. The dominant "ham" trait can be seen on a daily basis -- Beth hammering out a tune on her Melissa & Doug piano, then bowing with grandiose flair as she says, "Thank you, thank you, thank you"; Beth dancing around the living room, arms rolling, tush shaking, hair flying, to "My Sharona"; Beth being highly dramatic when things don't go her way, as when she doesn't get bunny gummies to eat for breakfast.
Our charismatic and expressive girl also has a deep hearty laugh that she isn't afraid to use in the quietest of places. She's silly and funny and is developing a killer sense of comedic timing. So, while she doesn't resemble us one iota, funnily enough, she acts like us 100 percent, and this brings us great joy.
I suppose we all want to see ourselves in our children. Strangers certainly seem to want our mother-daughter connection to be apparent, but, alas, that will never be (not without the help of an excellent colorist to recreate Beth's blonde high- and lowlights and a plastic surgeon to give me the face of a supermodel), yet I am more than satisfied that she and I share a similar temperament.
At a recent family gathering, Beth, for some reason we will never know, decided to lick the back of one of her cousins. The crowd response was "Eww…," followed by a huge laugh. As she began to giggle, I said, "We don't lick people." She said, quite remorsefully, "OK. Shore," then gave her cousin a hug. And then, licked him again.
Ah, that's my girl.
How do your children resemble you? I would love to hear from you!
Related Posts on AdoptiveFamiliesCircle
Meet the Author
Barbara HerelNew York
I have recently adopted or am adopting from...
Recent Adoption Blog Comments
I have not meet with my son´s BF but I have a couple of photos and he looks so much like her (and nothing like…...
I found the other site a week or so ago and was wondering about it. Now I know! ...
Thanks for sharing article ....i have read many blogs on open adoption and found that people are not much happy with open adoption. ...
Thank you for sharing your story. I have spent the last year and a half creating hair tutorial videos for parents of African American and…...
Thanks, Barb, what a unique story. I also liked what Sadie had to say about nature vs nurture: “There is something to this nature thing!”…...