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Adoption Blog: Talk to AF

You Knew You Were a Mom or Dad When… Contest

THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED. Thank you to everyone who shared one of their family's adoption memories for a chance to win a beautiful keepsake necklace.

Congratulations to the winner, AFC member kwebster0807. Here's the memory she shared:
"I knew I was a mother when I was waking every two hours for feeding. I was always a person who loved my sleep. Now I can't tell you the last time I slept in…. I love being a mommy!"

adoption memories contest - AdoptiveFamiliesCircleThe moment a tiny hand wrapped around your finger. The first time you kissed a boo boo. When you realized you could call your mom a grandmother. When did you know, in your heart, that you were a mom or dad?

In honor of National Adoption Month, in November, all AdoptiveFamiliesCircle members who tell us about the moment they knew they were a mom or dad will be automatically entered in a random drawing for the chance to win a Child of My Heart Pewter Necklace from Deirdre & Company ($35 retail value; pictured at left). To enter, add a comment to this blog post. Limit one comment per person. Contest closes November 30, 2011. See below for full rules.

Rules: No purchase necessary. Void where prohibited. Subject to all laws. All entrants must register a valid e-mail address with AdoptiveFamiliesCircle (see Terms and Conditions). Giveaway begins at 10 a.m. EDT on November 1, 2011, and ends at midnight EDT on November 30, 2011. Limit: one (1) entry per person. Approximate value of the prize, one Child of My Heart Pewter Necklace, is $35. Odds of winning are based on the number of eligible entries received. Sweepstakes sponsor: New Hope Media, LLC, 39 W. 37th St., 15th Floor, New York, NY, 10018.

Related Posts on AdoptiveFamiliesCircle


I knew that Sophie was meant to be ours the moment I saw her picture, we instantly felt a connection with her. But the moment I felt like a ‘Mom’ was when I was packing up a bag full of diapers, wipes, snacks, gifts, blankies, and toys the morning we went to the agency to bring her home, wondering if I had packed too much or not enough. As soon as I held her in my arms that day, I knew it didn’t matter what was in the bag, we had everything we needed.

By Ansom on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 6:19 pm.

I deployed to New Orleans for 30 days a week after my husband and I signed on with our adoption agency. The next day I was walking to lunch down Poydras street, in uniform, with my co-workers when the agency director called me. My lunch mates went into the restaurant and got a table and I stayed outside to take the call - she said we had been matched. Our son was due in four months. I broke down and cried because five years of craziness was coming to an end.  He was 15 days early, but born full term and I was able to hold the birth mother’s hand through labor, see his head come out and sing him happy birthday for the first time. The first thing my son heard was his mommy singing to him. Once he was fully out, the doctor handed me the scissors, and I don’t know how I saw through the river of tears, but I cut his cord, told him welcome and I love him so much. The nurse took him to clean him off and I gave the birth mother a hug and told her thank you from the bottom of my heart. The birth father was also there and we gazed at my little baby boy for about a minute until he was needed at his girlfriend’s side. I asked if I could touch this beautiful little baby in front of me and the nurse laughed at me. “Of course you can!” She said. “He’s your son, Mommy!.” I held his little unbathed foot in my hand and felt my heart explode. But when I saw my husband feed our son his first bottle I knew our little family was finally complete.

By Aconroy on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 6:39 pm.

It was sitting in his birth mother’s hospital room, shortly after delivery.  We were all chatting while she held the baby, and I remember watching them together and repeating in my head “This is not your son, this is not your son..” Because at that moment, he wasn’t - no papers had been signed, no rights terminated, and I was very mindful of that fact and had no wish to overstep my bounds.

She asked if I would like to hold the baby.  I nodded and moved forward, and while she was passing him over, she said “Here, Baby - go see your mommy,” and the words were like a benediction.  Just like that, the world shifted for me - the legalities no longer mattered.  In that moment, this beautiful boy became my son and I became his mother, all thanks to this wonderful, selfless stranger.

By mander78 on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 6:41 pm.

The day I was diagnosed with type I diabetes was the day I knew my husband and I would adopt and eventually become parents.  My disease, which has no cure, can make pregnancy very difficult, if not deadly for both the mother and the unborn baby.   

My day to day life with type I can be challenging, confusing, and exhausting.  I test my blood sugar ten times a day, use an insulin pump, count and weigh all the carbohydrates I consume, visit my doctors often, and deal with the symptoms of high and low blood sugars.  It’s a 24/7, 365 full time job. 

Despite all the ups and downs, the moment our first daughter, Ella, was placed in my arms, every appointment, every needle stick, every late night high blood sugar—-well, it was all completely worth it. 

Diabetes made me a mother through adoption, and I am blessed because of it.

By mamaof2browngirls on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 7:10 pm.

I flew to St. Petersburg, Russia to meet my son at the Children’s Home.  On the drive from the airport, they told me how excited my son was to meet me.  I arrived at the children’s home the next day very excited to meet my son.  After a few minutes of waiting, which seemed like hours, they brought him down.  Then he took one look at me and started SCREAMING.  They put us in a room together, but he would not stop screaming and would not come near me.  I was absolutely crushed and started thinking the whole trip would be a disaster. 

Finally, they took us up to the floor where he lived with the other kids.  He finally stopped screaming and played with the staff.  I sat on the floor and started taking video, wondering how this would ever work out.  He had to come near me to get a toy and saw himself on the video camera.  I rewound the video and to let him watch.  He jumped right in my lap to watch.  That’s when I knew he was my son and we finally connected.

By Dad1999 on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 7:16 pm.

Our daughter was born on May 9, 2011 and we had to wait 30 days from the day the surrenders were signed -  and so on June 9th at midnight I stayed up to see midnight pass and it did and we knew that the surrenders were binding - and at 6 am on June 10th, I sent out emails to 30 people telling them we were having a pizza and pink champagne party at 7 at our house that night….everyone pulled together and as I gazed out on the sea of family, friends gathered together for us I knew my husband and I were finally Mommy & Daddy.

By shazza0916 on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 7:55 pm.

I’m not sure of what i would do once i were to become a mother and then feel like i have to share my child…Help me understand that part of my relationship with the birthmother if she chooses open adoption

By ElleSanchez on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 9:19 pm.

I knew the first night we were home with our two-month old baby and she cried and cried and I kept thinking: “we’re not babysitting a friend’s child this time. There is nobody coming to get her later. This baby is mine and is up to me to calm her and sooth her from now on.” It was both terrifying and awesome to know that I was “it;” I was “mommy.”

By Gaby on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 9:30 pm.

In truth, there were many defining moments when I knew I was ‘Momma’ to our two youngest daughters, even before they came home from Liberia…  but THE one that really sticks out for me happened a couple of years after the girls were home.

I was marveling to my oldest daughter about how big the girls were getting, as they had started well below the growth chart norms for weight/height, and were now at the 95% for their height/weight for their age.

Anyway, here I was gushing on and on about how wonderful it was that they were going against all odds that had been stacked up against them with malnutrition and all… and as I sat reflecting on all of this I said to my daughter, “I mean, I know Dad’s fairly tall, but I’m not… so it’s amazing that they are getting this tall already!”

To which my daughter looked at me with this bemused look and said, “Mom… do you realize what you just said?” 

I looked at her, truly puzzled that she was so amused at my reflections… till my words played back in my head, and the light dawned… 

“Oh yeah…” I said laughing with her. “I guess we can’t take any credit for their beautiful tall stature now, can we?” 

You know, I had TRULY forgotten they were not ‘flesh of my flesh, and bone of my bones’...  for they are TRULY “my own”!!

By wannaliveforhim on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 10:08 pm.

Having read the stories posted before mine, I feel a little bad about this one, but here it is anyway, in all it’s raw truth!  Shortly after we arrived home from Russia with our little man, we began the process of updating/repeating his vaccines.  One day he needed several immunizations, in cluding a flu shot.  I sort of suspected he might already be getting a cold, but he hadn’t had a fever recently, so they decided to give the shots.  Well, that night everything went haywire.  Charlie spiked a very high fever and we spent forever on the phone with the Children’s Hospital hotline, running to find medicines, etc. I felt the commitment and joy of motherhood all in one moment when my poor little guy vomited curdled milk all over me as I was trying to rock him to sleep.  I’ve never been good with vomit, even my own, and I when I imagined that inevitable first incident during our wait, I thought for sure I’d wind up barf myself.  Instead my heart just hurt for him and and wiped him up while holding him and snugly as possible and continuing to rock him gently.  In my opinion, nothing make you look and feel like a parent more than loving the kiddos through the most unpleasant moments and still thinking with each passing second that you are living the dream!

By StLouieSusan on Tuesday, November 01, 2011 at 10:15 pm.
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