Photo Contests

Goofy Grins Photo Contest
Adoptive Families 2017 Goofy Grins Photo Contest
Share photos that show your child's silly side!

Family Hugs Photo Contest
2017 Family Hugs Photo Contest
Meet the winners, Lindley and her parents, and the finalists.

Holiday Photo Contest
2016 Holiday Photo Contest
Meet the winners, QingXin and Wei Hui, and the finalists.

Mommy Moments Photo Contest
2016 Mommy Moments Photo Contest
Meet the winners, Charlie and Thomas, and the finalists.

Daddy Moments Photo Contest
2016 Daddy Moments Photo Contest
Meet the winner, Finley, and the finalists.

Adoption Blog: My Paperwork Pregnancies

Adopting Does Not Improve Your Fertility
Filed Under:



More than once after I made the decision to adopt, I was told by people, "Just wait—now you’ll get pregnant!"

I usually gave a polite laugh and said something like, "Well that would be a surprise!" In my mind I was (perhaps rudely) thinking something along the lines of, "It’d be a heck of a lot cheaper than the infertility treatments or the cost of adoption," "Who knew all I had to do was stop infertility treatments to get them to work correctly?," or "Do you think I’m not happy to be adopting?"

I think people commonly say this after a person has announced their adoption plans, because they honestly do not know what to say when someone they know has tried so long to get pregnant. They aren’t aware of how much time, effort, and gut-wrenching emotion went into the decision to end infertility treatments and pursue adoption.

Someone must have heard from someone somewhere at some time about some woman who got pregnant once she decided to adopt—but that woman was not me. This story has become a bit of folk wisdom spouted as freely as, "Don’t count your chickens before they hatch."  Do they realize how, with such a simple phrase, they’re reducing an adoptive parent’s life, and the life of the adopted child, into a cliche?

The fact is the number of infertile people who get pregnant after pursuing adoption is the same number as infertile people who get pregnant after ending infertility treatments. The factor of deciding to adopt or adopting a child is not relevant.

I know a handful of couples who have gotten pregnant without infertility treatments once they chose adoption or had adopted. They were extremely surprised and happy not to have to spend the time and money on adoption. Some of these couples were even a bit mad that they got pregnant because they didn’t want to become the "cliche" which had annoyed them so much before.

As for me, I am convinced that my family is complete. If pigs decided to take flight and I became pregnant, I would be thrilled. But I’m not going to continue storing old baby clothes in hopes of this happening. I am going to move on with my life and not get wrapped up in the old "Could I be pregnant?" game. My focus is only on the three children who are already in my family.

Recently, my husband, Paul, told me a story of others expecting us to become pregnant once we adopted.  His co-worker announced that his wife was pregnant with their fourth child.

Paul told him that he couldn’t imagine having four kids because three make for a pretty hectic household. The co-worker (who knew we had adopted our children) said with a matter-of-fact tone, "Hey don’t count out having more kids. You never know…" Paul looked at him like he had two heads and replied, "What? Am I accidentally going to fill out some paperwork?"

 


Related Posts on AdoptiveFamiliesCircle

Archived Comments
We have recently changed our commenting system to improve the experience for our users. 13 Archived Comments may be found here.
Please post new comments below.

10 Comments

I had been trying for three years to get pregnant. I took hormones, used creams, my husband and I got checked, I was taking up to 35 pills a day to try to get things moving. by January I was told by the doctor, “There is noting else we can do for you”. Being a mother has been my dream since I was 4 years old and that news was beyond devastating. It was hard to be happy for anyone I knew that was pregnant or had children, especially younger people or people who had not planned it at all. I swore off facebook, baby showers, shows with children, anything that reminded me of what I would never have. I started to incorporate some Buddhist meditation into my life to try and find peace, i use priest raja medicine and by febuary I got my first positive pregnancy test. My baby girl is growing inside me,Feeling her kick me, hearing her heartbeat, these are the happiest things to have ever happened to me. I feel so fortunate. I can honestly say though, it’s not easy being pregnant after infertility. I am constantly worrying about her and begging her to stay with me, stay alive. Going from infertile to pregnant is a double edged sword, but I am so grateful to experience this and I can’t wait to see my sweet girl. now a mum of a beautiful baby girl. contact the priest with this email, he sure can help you, .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

By caroljones67 on Monday, January 09, 2017 at 7:36 am.

I want to use this opportunity to thank this great holy man called priest raja for what he has done for me and my family. This great man has brought happiness and joy back again to me and my family. Priest Raja has used his great and powerful to help me bring back my husband within the period of 48 hours and also helped me in getting pregnant with his powerful prayers and after 7 days of applying his herbs.This is more than words can say, at first i didn’t believe it but today it is so true and all thanks goes to him. i will advice every one out there that has a similar issue, and also any one who is willing to get his or her lover back and any one who wants to get pregnant quick to contact this wonderful man today and forever remain happy in life. Once again you can contact priest raja via his email address .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) . he is truly a miracle to the world

By lisabyron099 on Wednesday, January 18, 2017 at 10:46 am.

I never thought that they will be a miracle on the internet until i came in contact with Priest Babaka, finally i made it with the help with his spiritual power which was recommended by a lady in baby center he help before, i never believe it was real until i confirm it now because i have tried so many things to make sure i get pregnant but no luck, immediately i contact him. he did some spiritual prayers and send me a medicine which i took, i got pregnant three weeks after, and i now have a son to show. thank you so much Priest Babaka and i recommend Priest Babaka for everyone out there that is willing to have a child of her own out there. contact him for help too he is real and powerful i have confirmed it contact of him on his Email: .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

By kristenmax on Sunday, January 22, 2017 at 7:25 pm.

hi everyone i had been married since 3 and half years ago, since then i am trying to conceive. my age is 34 years now, my hormonal reports including FSH,LH,estrogen and thyriod function tests are normal, my diagnostic laproscopy is also normal and my husbands semen analysis is also normal. my serum prolactin levels are normal, but i have got breast tenderness and secretion after ovulation upto my periods. i have underwent three cycles of IUI without any success. now i am worried what to do? please give me possible reasons for this delay and what should be the future course of action. how can i have a baby for my husband that was my question. so a friend introduce me to this native iya basira so i contacted her, after using her herbs she sent, to my believe i was tested pregnant, it was an amazing miracle. when i showed my husband the result i could see the joy in his eyes, thank iya basira once again for your help, may the lord continue to bless you for the fertility help you are giving we women in need, this is her email contact, for you guys that need her help, she is a wonderful mother. .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

By marieboyden79 on Saturday, January 28, 2017 at 10:37 am.

Hello everyone am Diana Ernest from USA i have been married to my husband for 7years without no issue. on this faithful day, i decided to check the net for updates on healthy living and i came across a story of a man who Iya Hindi helped his wife to conceive a baby. i decided to put a try because this has been my greatest problem in life. today i am a proud mom. words will not be enough to explain what this man did for me. hes medicine for pregnancy really help me conceive i noticed i was pregnant on the 7th day after using the root and herbs . i am a happy mother, the pride of my family, a miracle in my town. i know there is someone in same condition and you feel there is no way. i urge you to contact him via email .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) is the solution to every single mother around the globe. distance is not a barrier, he will surely make your dreams come trough. you want your lover back or any other miracle in your life, contact him today .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) so the world can be a better place to live. bye!!!

By Daina Ernest on Wednesday, February 01, 2017 at 9:21 am.

The adoption process will definitely bring a sweet pleasure to us, but it doesn’t put a question in our fertility, around the world millions of people are taking the help of adoption to have a baby in their life. Here this article clearly mentioned the same fact about fertility and I hope we should take positive steps to improve our bonding with a baby which we adopt.
Child Care

By glennmarsden on Friday, February 10, 2017 at 6:29 am.

I was married at 32 and immediately tried to get pregnant. When I was unable to conceive I had blood tests for fertility and was told that I had an FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) of 54 and would not be able to have children. Even though the doctors knew that I had been diagnosed with Hashimoto’s thyroiditis since age 25, no one bothered to check my thyroid levels. my TSH was measured at .001. My Synthroid dosage was lowered. a friend advise me to contact a spiritualist who help with fertility with her medicine, i collected her contact an explain my situation to her she prepared for me a herbal medicine which i took as describe I by her. became pregnant very quickly,  I had a successful pregnancy. I have my baby august 2014. to get pregnant at age 35 with my 2nd child in september 2016, thank you mama , this is her email contact if you require her help .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

By nicolealex800 on Saturday, February 11, 2017 at 5:44 pm.

This is unbelievable friends Hello. It’s me again Jenifer I am 44 years woman I delivered twin girls some days ago.God saw me through the pregnancy.i want to us this opportunity to also thank Iya Hindi Native God made his root and herbs works that i was able to still conceive again at the age of 44 woman thanks you so much you are god send to help women have a happy home,I delivered twin I came out victorious. Pls thank God with me and I pray he meets you at the point of your needs. contact him via email: .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) .

By jenifferbieber5 on Tuesday, February 28, 2017 at 4:46 pm.

My name is Caroline Ahmed from New York,After 6 years of marriage with no child i finally I got pregnant Glory to God almighty my Dear sister am writing to you to share with you what the Iya Hindi Has done, I said to myself that I will testify when the Hindi does this with herbal medicine ,I emailed you for a request of your pregnancy medicine last year after seeing the testimonies of other ladies on your website online I decided t put my faith and come in agreement with you.Your pregnancy medicine and You prayed for me we agreed for me to conceive, Hallelujah!! Yes I did conceive two months after and I am now 4 months pregnant Glory to the Almighty God. I know I will have a smooth and easy delivery soon.contact him. .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)

By Caroline Ahmed on Thursday, April 06, 2017 at 7:06 am.

I would like to share my success story to every woman out there trying to conceive, My husband and I have been trying to have a child since we got married June 2013 and nothing happen so i was online searching for a solution when i come across a comment of a lady talking about Iya Hindi Root and herbs that she use and she got pregnant with it so decided to give a try to Iya Hindi herbal Medicine product for one month and i got a positive result i became pregnant .Our son is now 10 months old and we are so blessed! We thank God everyday for our precious gift.I will definitely recommend Iya hindi native to anyone who is also searching for a solution to Contact him .( .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) ) .Please continue with your good work to make more couples happy.

By Juliana Rivera on Friday, April 07, 2017 at 2:28 am.

Post a Comment

{headline}

Commenting is available to registered members only. Please log in or create an account.

Meet the Author

Danielle Pennel

Danielle Pennel

Missouri

I have recently adopted or am adopting from...
U.S. Newborn, U.S. Newborn

View Profile »


NATIONAL ADOPTION DIRECTORY


Find an Adoption Agency

Find an Adoption Attorney or Agency



Search the full directory ►




Recent Adoption Blog Comments